Friday, July 11, 2008

How to avoid a Deliverance experience on the backroads

I was driving with my daughter today to meet with our new primary care Dr in Southampton. We're tooling along the back roads to try & save time & avoid traffic. We're making great time for like the 1st half-hour. All of a sudden I see this white car with plastic garbage bags sticking out if it's grille, come zooming up on our butts outta nowhere. The driver and car reminded me of something out of that Beastie Boys video that I can't remember...Sabotage?

Well, we're both watching the side mirrors because he just rides my ass thru all the turns even where there's road construction going on. He would slow down enough to make the road people happy & then floor it right back to my back bumper. By this time, we've both seen "Jeepers Creepers"; and are thinking this is some crazed wacko...we don't dare stop because he's so close.

I wave him on past me so I could get rid of him. God, he seemed so determined to just get wherever the hell redneck crazy wackos hang out in the summer, but he's wearing his Deliverance face & continues to stray over the yellow line & then back on my ass. Fine, follow me all the way to my Dr, but I'm gonna have to hurt you if you hit my car. What a jerk! I felt like Karen Silkwood, waiting to be bumped off the road.

It was more than a little unnerving till I related the story to my honey; he said he knew why we're were being chased down....had to be the Obama '08 bumper sticker. How rude! GO OBAMA '08

- PB

- A simple way to avoid all of this is to cover your Obama sticker with one of our slick RudeHamptons bumper stickers.


  1. What town were you in when Jeeper Creeper latched on?

  2. I take extreme offense to "redneck crazy wackos hang out in the

    What in your mind gives you the right to call people rednecks?

    Does a truck make you a redneck?

    Maybe a fishing rod?

    Maybe even a little camo?

    Lifted truck?

    Oh, it's a white CAR with garbage bags in the grille. I think you are a great example of a rude summer person in the Hamptons.

    How Rude!

    I will be looking for that Obama sticker as I travel on the back roads. I will quiver with the thought of you hurting me. Have a great summer where ever you yuppie rude wackos hang out in the summer.

  3. Your Honey was correct, the "redneck crazy wackos" will all be chasing you down because of a Obama sticker. Had to be.

    Get a clue.

  4. I was in Noyac travellin' thru. I'm a local, who thru the efforts of our men & women in Iraq, HAVE the choice of having an Obama sticker on my car. Far from a yuppie, I was married to a "redneck" for 18 yrs, so I can call one when I see one. You sound a little defensive "SH says"...are you the guy who chased me down without concern for my safety, my daughter's or yours? Smooth. If you people can't wait to get where you're going...LEAVE EARLIER!!!

  5. No Obama Girl,

    It wasn't me who chased you down. Defensive because or your serious assumptions/generalizations. I don't like being tailgated either. (Can't say Ive ever been "chased down") Of course you have the right to have whatever bumper sticker you like; I don’t think that a “redneck wacko” would “chase you down” because of it. Sounds like a teenager that needs to relax. I would also be angry if I was that severely tailgated that I felt I was being chased. I on the other hand would either pull over and let him go by or stop short and see how my trailer hitch fits in that grill of his. Then I would promptly pull away with his radiator dragging from my hitch. Call me a redneck wacko......

  6. A true local would know that wasn't an Obama Hating redneck up your bumper, that was an idiot in a hurry. Us local "rednecks" are known for driving slowly, not indy-500 style. We don't drive itty crap cars either. This is also one of the most liberal areas in the nation, so I highly doubt your bumper sticker incited such rage. Good try though.

  7. Take a chill pill.July 15, 2008 at 11:57 AM

    Only a redneck would respond with such anger, SH. Those with trucks and fishing poles are casually referred to as "bubs". Rednecks are those who pride themselves on being white, toothless and drunk. I know many "teenage" boys who pride themselves on being rednecks by wearing and displaying the Rebel flag on all of their possessions. If this guy turned out NOT to be a redneck then he was definitely lost and suffering from some serious road rage.

    For a website that is supposed to bring the locals together, SH sure was quick to assume status on this writer (and others I'm sure), turns out we're locals you dumbass. Quit being such an angry person, find something other to do than spend time writing comments online and put it into something useful like giving the ritzy rude people your shit instead of others.

    Bottom line, I don't even feel safe driving until I hit sunrise because of the way people drive. The citiots come out and buy a nice new car but don't know how to drive because they spend all the their time in the city. So many people get hurt in accidents and the drivers out here are truly nuts: driving into the incoming lane, speeding through crosswalks almost & running over pedestrians, talking on their crackberries and other devices, site seeing and basically not paying attention to the road in front of them. And tailgating. Are you trying to tell me, SH, that if this crazy man were behind you so close that you couldn't read his license plate, you wouldn't be nervous or bothered? If not, I hope you two will meet on the road sometime and when you do make sure Jeepers Creepers doesn't throw you down some tunnel, eat you and then sew your skin to someone else's to make one giant skin blanket.

    (If you haven't seen Jeepers Creepers, I guess you wouldn't understand).

  8. Your sense of humor.July 15, 2008 at 7:05 PM

    "SH" & "Redneck": the Obama sticker comment was obviously humor, you've got to lighten up and stop taking offense to things that don't involve you. Why are there so many people leaving rude and negative comments on everything? This is supposed to be a light hearted and humorous site and you're ruining it with your negative vibes.

  9. Your sense of humor.July 15, 2008 at 7:09 PM

    Also, "SH", YOU sound like a teenager that needs to relax. Nothing like threatening people via the internet. "I dare you to call me a redneck wacko, I'll run you over. Vroom vroom." I've got a few candidates for RudeHamptoners, see above.

  10. Wow.. This was my first comment on line. I don’t “spend time writing comments online” just thought this was something I had to speak up on. Yes I did “assume status on this writer” just as she assumed the guy in a CAR was a redneck. Hey, maybe we were BOTH wrong to make assumptions. (Take a chill - assumed I’m a dumb ass redneck) Sorry, I assumed PB was a city person. I didn’t think a local would say “he seemed so determined to just get wherever the hell redneck crazy wackos hang out in the summer” So yes, I was wrong to say yuppie.
    I agree 110% about the city drivers! Obviously we weren’t talking about city drivers. (If we were, I’m sure we wouldn’t have gotten off on the wrong foot) I wrote earlier that I would be tremendously bothered by that driver’s conduct and I said what I’d do about it. So NO, I’m not trying to tell you it wouldn’t bother me. It was in no way intended as a threat!! Just saying, have to watch out for those trailer hitches when you’re tailgating. (That’s a very true statement, not a threat)
    “I dare you to call me a redneck wacko, I’ll run you over. Vroom vroom.” That isn’t at all how I meant my comments to come across.
    “For a website that is supposed to bring the locals together”, HA, please don’t blame me for responding to a post that was from a local about a local. I didn’t start a local against local post nor did I know what I was getting into one.
    I find it so comical that you think I’m ruining this site with negative vibes, this whole site is one complain fest about negative things and people. “This site has been created to let people vent about the various encounters they have with rude people throughout the Hamptons” I will do you all a favor and keep my comments to myself in the feature, I promise. I’ll take one key lesson I must have forgot, two wrongs don’t make a right.
    P.S. I’m certainly not a teenage redneck or bubs. (I think bubs is used more so in East Hampton then Southampton) Most positively don’t have the rebel flag anywhere.

  11. Off topic, but Bubs are from East Hampton, Springs specifically, and have been here for at the very least over 200 years. Lol.

  12. the tailgating jerk was probably an illegal alien. It was a good thing you got out of his way since he probably didn't have a drivers license anyway.

  13. Whoa Rodney said "can't we all just get along?" (us locals anyway?) Unfortunately, this is what happens during the summer months, our visitors from the best City in the world, come & dump on us & treat us like crap. Then...we all start becoming like them, out of self defense and then we're attacking each other. Their plan worked, they've turned us into "them". While we sit on the sidelines dissing each other, they've stolen our parking spaces; seats at the movies; prime sunset spot, etc.
    Let's stay united and keep an eye out for the truly rude. We're all just frustrated until our towns become ours once the peaceful winter time.

  14. You have the right to have an Obama sticker if you want one. Why is it that rednecks, who claim to be so proud to be Americans, try to take away the rights of people who disagree with them. By doing this they are being very UN-American. If they really want to live in a country where everyone is forced to have the same views they should become communist or fascist, or maybe they should accept that they live in a democracy and allow others to have opinions that differ from theirs. I know that I have been threatened with violence by ignorant rednecks for having an intelligent opinion and being able to express myself. In my opinion, redneck = UN-American, they try to deny the constitutional rights of other people.